My 16 yo daughter use drugs and doesn't go to school at all.She admits that she has a problem and tries to

Question

stop,but everytime she looses control and starts again.She's very bright,nice girl who unfortunately can't control her habbit.I decided to send her to a special camp for kids like her and then to boarding school.The thing is it's very expensive, and there are so many camps and schools to choose from.Did somebody
have the same problem?Is there scholarships for this kind of programms? I'm a single mom struggling to make ends meet. Any advises?

Answer 1

BE THE PARENT - not her best friend. I had to make tough calls with my daughter, and while she swore she hated my very existence on this earth, when all was said and done down the road, she phoned me with tearful sobs apologizing for the hell she put me through. She said she now knew that it must have taken a mountain of love to push her to be a better person.



It may seem like an eternity - but do not give your daughter any ground. You set the rules. If she disobeys staying out all night or hanging out with people who she shouldn't - you turn her into the police or get he into a hospital.



Whatever it takes DO IT. Call a Drug Hotline or Drug Assistance program and discuss it. Help and ideas are there but it all boils down to your being tough with daughter.



You love her and you think its being cruel. I know, I was there. Be a rock because all she will do is take advantage. She has to hear "I love you intensely BUT because I love you I must draw the line."



Don't balk. I hope this helps. I'll be praying for you and your daughter.



Any time you start feeling soft - picture your child dead because of your inaction or in prison because you did not have the stomach to stick to your guns. Some kids end up that way despite our best efforts as parents - but the key is doing something to stop it. The effort counts. Love counts. And love is not always kind.

Answer 2

Your health insurance should cover in patient treatment for drugs and psychological therapy. That is the route you need to go. Boarding school is not rehab and that is where she needs to be is rehab. I went to boarding school and that is where I first smoked, drank and had sex. (It was an all girls school, but there were still boys in town!) Any bad habits I had, I learned there. It is hard to be a single mom, this I know. Make life easier on yourself and on her. Get her the help that she desperately needs from medical professionals. I really hope you take my advice to heart and that things work out for you.



P.S. I forgot to mention that if you do not have health insurance, go to your local Department of Human Services to see what aid you qualify for. I am sure she is a great kid and will do great with proper treatment!

Answer 3

well my brother is the same way. He lives in FL with my mother and the police wont do any thing about it. he has ran away was out of school for 2 1/2 yrs. He was doing drugs and well the only way we got him help was me calling the cops because he hit me while i was holding my son and i press charges. it was hard to do but i had to do it for my brother he was put in juvi for a yr and he just got out about a week ago. he is doing ok now and has to call his probation officer before he leave and has to be home at 6 and call the officer again to let her know that he is home. the only thing i can really tell you is that she needs help. I was also the same way but i was going to school and was not doing drugs i was just skipping school every now and then.... but i was running away and stealing and sleeping around with guy on Internet and i got preg. i have a beautiful 3 yr old son and he is the only reason i changed. i stopped smoking when i found out i was preg. i found out at 4 weeks so i was able to stop to protect the baby. the only thing i can see for her is become a teen mom and i wouldn't wish it on any Young teen but i would do it all over again. but just get her some help.

Answer 4

Your health insurance should pay for an residential treatment center for a girl her age it will most likely be a 3 month stay. If you don't have health insurance then I'd find out what types of public assistance you would qualify for now. I wouldn't worry about how you are going to pay for it now though, just concentrate on getting her the help that she needs to overcome her addiction. Her life is worth it, isn't it? You can ask your daughter's school nurse or counselor for information of treatment centers in your area. Good luck.

Answer 5

Sorry to hear about your daughter but is she ready to get help. I have gone to alot of meetings for AA and had a lot of friends with this problem. And I noticed you commented on how she tries to stop and slips again. First and for most don't bang your head against a wall and try to help and go broke doing it if your daughter is not ready to get the help she needs if she don't want it nothing is going to work anyway. Also stop making excuses for her as you said and i quote ( she's very bright nice girl who can't control her habbit.) She can controll it and if she wanted to be clean she would be by now. There is some part of her that just don't want to be clean and being nice and bright has nothing to do with it she has to want the help and do it on her own to insure it works. Take this how you want it but it's the truth. She can go from hospital to hospital and be clean while she is there but when she comes out she has the same friends and connections to just go back. You need to get rid of them all anyone she hangs with now and uses with is no friend of hers. Most hospitals will tell you this also and you should be able to get her into one on a inpatient basis don't wait till she over doses and has no choice to be cleaned up but then again when she comes out it wil be right back to square one if she don't want it.

Answer 6

where i live there is a program called scared straight. i would talk to a police officer and he can scare her with the convicts. i know it is your daughter but if you want her to live a long healthy life you need to make sacrificies. it sounds bad but she has a problem and the only way to deal with it is to get her help even if it means putting her in jail for a while. i had a friend and he went through it and when he came out he was a changed person. if she is doing that there is no telling what else she is doing, so you should nip it in the but now while you can before it gets to serious.

Answer 7

Even though she is your daughter the only responsibility that you have at this point is to love her. But to go into debt over something you had no control over is where you have to draw the line. Granted it is easier said than done but regardless it has to happen. I have a mother who still blame us for not doing more but we could not rescue her, It hurt me to know end to watch my mother go through that but guess what? When she got tired she made changes. And that's what you love will see her to the point where she decides to let this habit go. It will take time and a lot of tuff love. I know you may think I'm crazy but I'm just trying to help...

Answer 8

If you want free help, you should try Dr.Phil or the Maury show, but then you would have to air out your dirty laundry all across the nation...



Just send her to juvi, she should straighten up there. Plus its more affordable than the boot camps. Also consider family counsling. There are free counslers at your local YWCA.

Answer 9

My 16 yr old son is doing the same thing.I put him in drug classes and he got kicked out for going to class high.I call the school every day and tell them he won't get up,and that I can beat the crap out of him and he still won't go.I was told that they can petition the court on him and that I won't get into trouble.

Answer 10

Call social services on her. If you don't someone will and you'll be in trouble for letting her not go to school. Tough love is the only way sometimes. Good luck to you.

Answer 11

call maury..he helps a lot of teens with problem...1800-45-62789(1800-45-maury)..or visit him on the web at mauryshow.com

Answer 12

Get her on Dr.Phil woohoo